Family Relations-- Annie Elliott

Hello Everyone!  Welcome back to another week! I just wanted to highlight the things that have resonated the most with me from my studies in the past 12 weeks. When it comes to learning about families, I think we can never know too much. We are always going to need to be growing, learning, and progressing, and the past 12 weeks have done just that for me. I hope you can gain something from my takeaways list! The first takeaway I got from my studies was the importance of family. Our circumstances are constantly changing but our families are forever. That is how God designed the family to be, and He wants us to treat our family the best. Being with our family and children is where we can experience true joy. I’m not saying friends aren’t important or that they don’t bring us that joy that we need, I just think we lose sight of the importance of having a family and prioritizing them over everything else. Go on dates, have fun with friends, but ultimately prepare to have a family becau...

Welcome back and I hope you all had a great week! I just wanted to start off by saying that I know that parenting and raising children is so challenging. Especially in the world we are living in today where there is so much chaos, distrust, and temptations at our fingertips. While I don’t have any personal experience or expert advice to offer, I can share what hit home to me this week as I was studying some articles this week. I know parenting is hard work, so I am going to try to implement these skills many years down the road when I hopefully have the opportunity to be a parent.  One thing I think is so important in raising children in the world we are living in is making sure our children get enough Vitamin N. Vitamin N just happens to be the word “No.” I found this video extremely fascinating in my studying this week and I’ll link it here: (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j3cgUhtRUbE). Giving your children everything they want will never satisfy their needs. What you don’t need...

Hello everyone!  We're talking about fathers and their influence and importance this week! Fathers are so important and influence their children more than they know. Fathers tend to get a bad rap or women tend to think they can parent alone, but the truth is, both fathers and mothers bring really important things to the table. Below are the five things I feel that are important that fathers contribute to the family.  Fathers help children to grow and develop to their best abilities. Studies have actually shown that having a involved father both during pregnancy and after the child is born helps them to develop properly. An involved father leads to less maternal pregnancy health challenges. When fathers are involved in their children’s lives, the children have higher academic achievement, and are better prepared when they do eventually go to school. They also tend to have higher self-esteem and fewer behavioral problems as well. Studies have shown that the children’s wellbeing ...

Hello everyone! Welcome! *Attached below is a talk that taught me so much! If you don’t read my post, at least read the article attached below :) One of the most important aspects of a healthy marriage is being able to communicate and problem solve effectively with one another. I want to start off by emphasizing that communication takes EFFORT! The more you communicate, the better you will get at it and you will be more effective at communicating with others as well.  In communicating with others:  -14% is words -35% is tone -51% is body language That is why it is so crucial that we practice communicating with others because in doing so, we are able to learn how to read body language, facial expressions, and tone better. Also in practicing communication with others, we learn how to better encode our messages so that others can understand them, and we better learn how to decode the messages others are trying to share with us.  Like I mentioned before, good communication, a...

 Hello everyone! Welcome back! Is avoiding stressful things and striving to make life the easiest as possible the best way to live? or the best way to really learn and grow?  I don’t think so! Think of the last time you were stressed. Was it family problems? Homework? Finances? Relationships? There are a lot of things that can contribute to our stress. It is important that we handle them in a healthy way, but stress can actually be a good thing. Stress and anxiety on the brain can actually help things to be ingrained into our memory. It can also be a motivation for us to do well on something that we have been working towards. It is important to remember too that anxiety is a natural, normal brain response to perceived danger so don’t feel like you are the only one who experiences it. Heavenly Father designed our brains the way that they are for a reason, and I know there is purpose to us working through these types of challenges we are facing.  One thing that can cause ma...

Hello everyone! I hope you had a great week! I just want to say, I am, in no way, shape, or form, experienced on this topic at all, but I just wanted to share what I learned in my studies this week! So that’s what this post is all about. A summary of my readings and study this week.  Physical Intimacy is an important part of our relationships in marriage, but it is important to treat it with the sacred nature in which God intended it to be treated with. I don’t believe it is meant to be kept secret, but intimacy should be talked about in a sacred and mature way. Kids are hearing all sorts of things in school and from their peers, which is why it is important to teach them in a healthy and sacred way about such a sacred thing.  Those who choose to be intimate with each other before marriage deal with a whole set of challenges. There is a reason God commanded everyone to save this side of themselves for marriage. Women actually experience a release of the hormone oxytocin when...

Hello! Thanks for reading today! Although marriage is amazing and treasured, there are some significant adjustments that come with getting married and starting a new life with someone else from a completely different background then yourself. Sometimes engagement can be a critical time in the relationship because you have a lot of decisions to make about your future. During this time, it is important to start to set boundaries for yourself and your future relationship.  Topics of conversation for an engaged couple should be things like; • How do we handle conflict?  • How do we handle intimacy? • How many kids? And when do we have kids? • Should we continue our education? • How do we handle finances?  • Where are we going to live? This list really could go on and on, but engagement is a critical time to plan out these things for your marriage. Obviously, life circumstances are always changing, but discussing the most important foundational things for your marr...

Hello everyone! I hope you had a great week! Today we are going to talk about dating. To start off, I want to ask; how do you feel about dating? And when was the last time you went on a date? In the world we live in today, dating is becoming less and less common and is being replaced by “hanging out.” I have lived this being a college student today. The dating scene isn’t what it used to be and girls are getting asked on dates less and less often. The truth is, dating gets you prepared for marriage. It helps you to see someone in many different situations to really get to know them to see if you are compatible or not.  President Dallin H Oaks, first councilor in the First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, states in his talk “Dating versus Hanging Out,” that “dating has nearly disappeared from college campuses and among young adults generally. It has been replaced by something called ‘hanging out.’” Hanging out is usually in a group setting and doesn’t a...

Men and women both have gender-typical characteristics that, when looked at closely, you can actually see a connection to the divinely appointed roles in the family proclamation. I find that super fascinating! God designed male and female the way that they are to be perfect partners for each other in marriage, and in having and raising a family. In the confusion of the world, it is important to remember that God doesn’t make mistakes and you are the gender that you are for a reason. God knows you, loves you, and made you the exact way you are for a purpose.  When we study female-typical characteristics, we see that women are typically more nurturing and cooperative. They make decisions based off how that decision will affect others and themselves. Women are more emotionally expressive, and sensitive to other’s emotions as well. They also orient themselves based on landmarks, more so than North, East, South, and West, which I can totally attest to because I am terrible at directio...

Every family has traditions and it’s own culture. Think about your family. What traditions and cultural characteristics can you think of that you see in your own family? I know I can think of so many!! While there are some cherished traditions in our families, I can also think of a few traditions that could potentially be mentally harmful for members of the family and might not have the best lasting effects for individuals in the family.  One tradition I loved as a kid, and still today, was getting to go out with my parents individually for what we call “Birthday Dinner.” Whoever’s birthday it is gets to pick the restaurant, then have an hour or so alone with our parents to celebrate their birthday. This tradition is a family favorite because since we grew up in a house with 6 kids, we didn’t have a lot of alone time with our parents, so we truly treasured this one-on-one time with our parents. It helped us to feel seen, loved, valued, and treasured. Those traditions are the ones t...

Hello everyone! I hope you had an amazing week and I am excited to talk to you all more about families and family relationships! Boundaries are an important part of relationships. Especially for relationships within the family. In reading some articles this week, I learned about a few different boundary types that I would like to share with you. From there, I am going to talk about those different boundary types within a family, and how that affects the family.  The first type of boundary is a rigid boundary. You can imagine a house with a cinder block fence with barbed wire on top as a rigid boundary. This appears out of reach and somewhat cold and distant. Some people put up a boundary like this as a defense mechanism, so their feelings don’t get hurt. I am actually guilty of this myself. In a relationship with a spouse, or anyone in your family really, having a boundary like this can make it extremely difficult to build a relationship with trust and love.  On the opposite e...

  Hello! I hope you all had a wonderful week! Here is what stood out to me in my class this week: In the world we live in today, there are more people deciding not to have kids and not have families. While it doesn’t seem like that would be a big deal, there are actually several problems that stem from people not having children and families anymore. With less families, there are less people to replace the baby boomers who are now retiring and are out of the workforce. That causes major problems for employers, as they wouldn’t be able to staff their workplaces. Here are some of the factors leading to families being diminished:      • Delaying marriage, leading to less kids being born. Or if people get married late in life, they are unable or too late to have children. People fear both commitment and divorce these days, so they decide to either cohabitate, which is living together for extended periods of time without getting married, or they just never get married. ...

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 Hello! My name is Annie Elliott and I am a student at Brigham Young University-Idaho. Thank you for being here and I hope you enjoy reading my insights on familial relationships, dating, and everything in between!