A Little Recap Post!!

Hello Everyone! 

Welcome back to another week! I just wanted to highlight the things that have resonated the most with me from my studies in the past 12 weeks. When it comes to learning about families, I think we can never know too much. We are always going to need to be growing, learning, and progressing, and the past 12 weeks have done just that for me. I hope you can gain something from my takeaways list!

The first takeaway I got from my studies was the importance of family. Our circumstances are constantly changing but our families are forever. That is how God designed the family to be, and He wants us to treat our family the best. Being with our family and children is where we can experience true joy. I’m not saying friends aren’t important or that they don’t bring us that joy that we need, I just think we lose sight of the importance of having a family and prioritizing them over everything else. Go on dates, have fun with friends, but ultimately prepare to have a family because God values families and we can learn so much from our families. 

I also want to emphasize that mothers and fathers have important and unique and individual roles in the family. The things that a mother and a father bring to the table are so important and provide children with the best environment to survive and to thrive. 

Another takeaway I got in my studies was the importance of boundaries. Specifically aiming for “picket fence” boundaries. What I mean by that is boundaries that are clear, but inviting to others at the same time. Boundaries are the best way to keep both people in the relationship happy and valued, and to keep healthy relationships with those outside of the relationship as well. Setting boundaries isn’t easy, but it is so important and helps the relationship to thrive.  

The know quo was something we learned about that was foreign to me, but I loved learning about it and am going to apply it to my life and share it with others. The components of the “Know Quo” are the 3 t’s of getting to know someone. The first T is “togetherness” meaning shared activities that you like doing together. The second T is “talk” that encompasses mutual self-disclosure. The third T is “time.” It emphasizes the fact that it takes three months to even start to get to know someone. It is important to apply these principles in dating especially because it really does take time to get to know each other. It also takes work so it is important to put in the work. 

Another thing that stood out to me from the class was how stressful events can either bring the family together or tear it apart. Think about it, is a life with no stressful events really a life that brings you joy? I would argue no. I think stressful events teach us resiliency and really help us to become something more than what we are. 

Something else that I loved learning about was the importance of communication in relationships. The five secrets of communication were part of my studies, and they kind of walk people through the steps of resolving conflict. The first step is the Disarming Technique. This encourages looking for the truth in what the other person is saying to disarm them and disarm yourself. It helps them to feel validated in what they are saying and feeling. Expressing Empathy is the second step and it really deepens the connection between the two of you. Next is Inquiry, which is asking questions so they feel understood. Next is I Feel Statements. This is saying “when (event), I feel (emotion word), because (thought), and I would like (polite request). The last step is using a stroking technique to help the other person feel better and deepen your connection to one another. 

I just want to encourage you to value your families, to know you belong and to know your worth and what God designed you to be. I also encourage you to know the importance of boundaries and to establish those boundaries to protect yourself and your relationship if need be. Get to know others well, try to seek learning through the stressful events you are going through, and strive to communicate effectively with those around you, and especially your spouse and close family members. 

Thanks for being here today!

Love, Annie